Did you eat?
Yes.
There’s carrot cake with cream cheese frosting.
Oh, good. I’ll have some later.
And walnuts.
Good.
How was work?
A man in Oklahoma was googling ‘carbon
In the summer between Michael Sam’s selection in the NFL Draft and the day he was cut, his jersey ranked as the second most popular of all rookie jerseys, behind only Johnny Manziel of the Cleveland Browns. Almost like there are gay sports fans.
Here's your spagetti and wheat-balls. Don't worry...it won't taste bad.
A few weeks ago my wife told that I have some mild hoarding tendencies.
She said she was sick of it. The thousands of marijuana roaches I'll never smoke. All the goddamned books lying
It’s time to stop relying on sunsets to help move us away from tonight and into tomorrow.
I pass a woman who holds a red polka dot Christmas music box in her lap. I never see her turn the key, but as I scan the aisles for my specific things—the white balsamic vinegar, the slivers of blanched almonds—I hear Jingle Bells faintly, somewhere behind me, no matter where I am.
Luis was walking home from work one evening when a man stepped in front of him, blocking his way on the sidewalk.
The man was dressed in a black coat and he was wearing a tan hat.
“I have
A request to the new tenant
Walls bare but for paint & hooks, floors bare but for stains & nails,
we leave insides as we find them; yet of neighbors &
I’m 23-years-old going through a mid-life crisis. Well, not quite mid-life considering I’m convinced I have less than seven years left to live.
People want their maniacs explained. But there is no autopsy deft enough to expose how sensually disfigured a mind can get.
The afternoon we chose the new chief of Cyclops Island, we stood in a circle at the top of the isle’s highest peak, heads drooping, as we squinted and sweated in the sun. The chief had positioned
That ability to dissociate—to look from above. You think it would make us save ourselves, seeing the planet from afar, feeling like with one hand, maybe you could fix it.
As David Lee Roth straddled a giant inflatable microphone, Alex Van Halen banged out the staccato drum opening of “Hot For Teacher.” Soon, his brother Edward Lodewijk “Eddie” Van Halen turned his
Watching the musical Annie is something like a rite of passage for redheaded children. I’ve met so many carrot tops in my life who grew up humming the tunes of Charles Strouse and Martin Charnin,
Earlier this year, Tobias Carroll interviewed me and asked, “Your previous book, How to Predict the Weather, had a blurb from Botch/Narrows vocalist Dave Verellen. Has there been any hardcore that’s
We tell each other the names / of our dead. The cities we live in // are gnawing then burying / the cadavers of opulent dreams.
A few months back, I got the opportunity to (once again) indulge the teenage role-playing geek inside me when I got a short-term contract job editing game materials for Paizo, the company
