On our third date, we went shopping for funeral outfits.

I                vomit till I’m              hollow.

I don’t write “I have the libido of a sloth” in my online dating profile. I don’t use my real surname now either.

The only reason I’ve seen Space Jam: A New Legacy so much recently is because I wanted to avoid talking to my wife.

“And then after I came out to my wife, she stumbled across People Can Change,” said the man from Fresno.

Marriage is often thought of as having little to do with eroticism.1

I met my husband while bartending in Oakland. He applied to be the new chef. Tattooed knuckles. Chubby cheeks. Full beard.

My mother had been on a rampage to find me a husband since I started college.

The whole first week after moving into his Brooklyn apartment – our apartment he keeps correcting me – I’m horribly constipated.

Oh, absolutely a mistake to have given the wealthy Protein Bar Daddy my number.

Seventeen days since you spoke your last words to me. They repeat themselves in my mind, I never want to forget them.

We get back together, because of course we do. He is better, now. Therapy helps both of us.

My grandfather drives me up to Sarah Lawrence choking back tears. As soon as he leaves, I cut off my earlocks in the bathroom and change into Outside World clothing.

I saw into the face tattooed on his thigh and thought, I am not afraid.

Going to work after you’ve been on an meth bender in a brothel is not a good idea,

My father locked his children up in a house for years for fear that they would die of pesticides from plants. More than that, we were locked in our rooms with a gate.

The first six months I took hormones I was frumpy and ridiculous looking. I didn’t know anything about makeup or styling

Tim tells me that broke up is strong language to use. I wonder how he would describe our ending. Broke up implies an entity to be broken, but we never made it that far. I still don't know what we

I was with a Serbian who said, “Tonight is about your pleasure,” so I was doing great.

I’ve been trying to find this quote by Chris Kraus from Aliens & Anorexia I think, but the quote is nowhere in my notebooks, even though I remember writing it down obsessively.

The night before Easter he ties his belt around my neck and gives it to me to hold.

He was black, handsome, and nonthreatening, so white people loved him.

you have probably peed with everyone you’ve ever loved, including the woman you do right now

When he drops you off at home you realize the soles of your feet are covered in tar.

Why are you telling me this?

I just want you to know.

Sometimes I imagine I’ll get a long email from her, explaining why, when a family reunion stopped her from coming on the trip, she gave up on our friendship. Did I somehow offend her?