I slept with Sam in my bed when he was still a puppy, even though this is supposed to be a bad way to train a dog. He woke me up... more

My parents, three hours into their marriage, ate sliders and crinkle fries. It was the summer of 1987, an Original Slider cost just 30... more

About two weeks into the Coronavirus Quarantine, I began noticing some odd behaviors.

I wandered the recreated Titanic dozens of times during my middle school summer of 1998, hiding from the heat and shitty... more

All the Lovesick attendees were gathered outside to listen to the event’s MC, but he was struggling to figure out how to turn on his mic.

I caught a glimpse of a man’s leg, narrow but with glances of plumpness, the soft hairy shin, down to the inside of the bony foot, tapering... more

The night before the Super Bowl, we were drunk in Miami after hours of non-stop tequila Sprites.

Victor Buono played King Tut in the 1960’s Batman show. He waddled in gold and red robes, his campy lisp... more

The circular is peppered with the “free” of Buy One Get One Free, as opposed to the “free” that is both propaganda and sacred text. I know, in total, the Arabic for peach, name, gesundheit, and thank you.

im always in the wrong lane

Medical professionals are careful to point out that cerebral palsy itself doesn’t inhibit sexual desire or function, though studies show that most young adults with CP report physical problems related to sexual contact.

She never sticks around for harvest (though she convinced you to plant rosemary, lavender, zinnias, to think of time as a full moon, as a thrush’s song), you’ll say, but O the planting season. The spry seedlings at the start.

My almost-ex was freaking out in the way only men with egos can.

Always, I am navigating some half-abandoned landscape— part future, part past. Whenever I have a companion, it is my ex husband—the man who, after our divorce seven years ago, moved states away, leaving me to raise our kids mostly solo. On this particular morning, it finally occurs to me that these dreams may not be normal.

It doesn’t sit right anymore, so neither does he. But in the Brooklyn neighborhood where my mom grew up, he’d walk on his hands for an audience of Irish-Catholic children. Older now than he was then, they’re still in awe. 

There’s a picture of you at queer prom, in the photo booth, faces alight with total bliss.

I removed an aluminum tab from my son's mouth and told my friend her eyebrows looked good. Her heart seemed full.

The cops said this was legal if the cat was on his property.

I knew making him leave would be like pulling a turtle from its shell; we grew up thinking they were two different things, when really they were one.

The text said: Hey! I think I just saw you cross the street (I’m in the red Prius). How are you?

Did your grandmother live not on a lake, but near? 
No but my Grandfather lived in Long Island, near the bay. My grandmother lived in Wisconsin. She was far away. She was the good one. 

On Human Origins

You take a half-person’s body, then another half-person’s body, and you connect them together and put them inside... more

This is how we played: one of us would lay on top of the other fully clothed, “go dead,” and see if the other could move. He... more

I bought a compilation of Michael Jackson Number Ones when the Wal-Mart Supercenter finally opened. It feels right to have viewed the future from my bedroom, door closed, music up.

In fact, even if I could reverse my reach through the years spanning us and stop you, I don’t think I would.