/pəˈzeʃ.ən/

One morning I woke up with my right scapula in my mouth. You would think that is physically impossible, but in the case of demonic possessions it is actually more normal than not. I, specifically, was possessed by a famous demon called Robert. Perhaps you have seen this in movies - if you haven’t, I’ll explain. When you are possessed your body is tormented in inhumane ways, you lose yourself, your personality and your desires and become the puppet of a demonic entity.

Robert wasn’t a complete stranger to me; I had met Robert before when I was a little girl. He was invited to my house for dinner, as a friend of my dad’s or something. I don’t remember too well. He seemed weird to me, but I was too little to understand how to identify a demon. Back then he left me alone. Robert doesn’t feed on children. He’s not a pervert. He waited until I was old enough and entered my body while I was passed out from Daedalon and Ibuprofen in a vulnerable moment of the morning-after.

‘I will break your spine is that alright with you.’

‘Yes, Robert, go ahead.’

I’ve met many demons in my life before, but it’s rare to meet such a polite one. If he hadn’t broken my bones in torturous ways, I may have thought of him as a nice guy. He even stole my phone and messaged all my contacts saying something like:

“hey I’ve been possessed by a demon called Robert,
please don’t contact me unless it’s urgent,
 he could make me rip your throat out xx”
 

Thanks to Robert’s far-sightedness, no one else had to get hurt. Only I was subjected to his wrath, which is good in a way, I guess. Although I cannot lie, my scapula in my mouth, my spine broken and a demon inside me was not comfortable at all.

Robert would let me wake up alone every morning, so I could prepare the house for him. I must say I deeply enjoyed the alone time. I would wake up at 5am, go to the butchers to get fresh goat meat and pig’s blood to prepare breakfast. Every once in a while, I caught some spiders in the garden and brought them inside so that they could decorate the corners with stringy webs. There was a fireplace in my living room, but I was not allowed to use it. Robert liked the cold so we would leave the windows open at all times. The flowers had to be left alone to die and I had to throw out all my crafting equipment, which was a hobby of mine at the time. Robert was not a fan of activities he did not enjoy; therefore, I didn’t enjoy them either. Usually around 9am Robert woke up inside me and began my daily torture.

I knew that in a way I was lucky to have Robert. I was never really alone. I was protected from everyone in the outside world and although my body was covered with bruises and ached from broken bones, he let me rest on days I couldn’t move from my injuries. He had some level of compassion, which is rare in a demon. I had to feel lucky for that.

I know that other demons torture their possessions to the point that they are unable to complete daily tasks, or in the worst cases, they die. Instead I was alive and could do whatever chore Robert asked me to. But it still felt somewhat wrong. I needed some sort of a compromise from him. He had my whole body, my essence, my phone, my rights, my interests, my family, my friends, my emotions. I just needed a little authority, maybe one hour more in the morning or a book that I could read.

One morning before Robert woke up, I found my phone and called an anti-demon helpline.

They gave really helpful advice on how to handle the situation and pushed me to consider my needs as a priority. I took a brave step and talked to Robert once he woke up.

‘Hey Robert, do you mind if we go to an exorcist?’

‘It’s perfectly fine, don’t worry. Although I doubt it will work.’

We searched together. The anti-demon helpline had their own team of exorcists that looked very professional on their website. There were many positive testimonies of past clients. Unfortunately, Robert thought that his voice would not be heard at a session with them. He explained to me that as demon and possession we have to find solutions that cater to both of our needs and that the anti-demon helpline was not a safe space for him. I understood and let him choose an exorcist that seemed more acceptable. Through a demon forum we found a firm, called Mark 7:24-30, with high reviews.

Our exorcist’s name was Roberta. A coincidence that made us giggle a little bit. She was high on demand, but since we were first-time clients, she saved an hour of her time for us. Her office was in the rural outskirts of our city, far away from traffic and human noises. We were welcomed by an assistant, who seemed to be healing from a broken arm. She showed us around in the building and explained how their firm worked. Their approach was unique, since they did not victimize the possessions, instead were looking to create a middle ground. The staff of Mark 7:24-30 believed that there are no black and white characters in a demon-possession dynamic and disagreed with society’s harsh judgement of demons. I could feel Robert growing happier and happier inside of me.

Roberta’s office was painted with a deep shade of maroon with dozens of golden crosses scattered around the floor. A bit dramatic decor, but it fit the theme. There were two seats prepared, a large leather sofa for Roberta and a small wooden stool for me. Throughout our session I had to be conscious not to get a spike in my butt, sitting on the very edge of my seat. Roberta offered us tea, but Robert doesn’t like flavoured water, so we had to refuse. She opened her notebook and clicked her fluffy golden pen.

‘So, let’s begin with you Robert. What made you possess the narrator?’

‘I would say that she seemed comfortable to be inside of.’

‘Aw, Robert, that’s so sweet!’ I felt flattered by his comment.

‘That’s interesting Robert. Could you elaborate on this impression? How did you feel when you first met her and how long did you wait to act on the possession?’

‘I first met her around eight years ago. She seemed beautiful, naïve and alive. She was soft and loving, even as a child. Since that day I think I have been waiting for the right moment to enter her. Once I’ve seen that she is ready, I took her under my power while she was asleep.’

‘Was this painful for you narrator? Answer this question while keeping in mind that Robert is listening and has deep feelings for you.’

‘Yes, it was a little bit uncomfortable, you know he broke most of my bones, but I guess he was really nice about it.’

‘I don’t like to cause too much trouble.’ Said Robert from inside of me.
            ‘That is really caring of you Robert! Before we continue, I would like to explain a concept that we feel strongly about at Mark 7:24-30. We believe that possessions are not one-sided relations, how many choose to believe, but rather they resemble a symbiotic structure. In your case for example, Robert as a demon has a strong desire to enter and drain a human soul. But by serving him and allowing him to use you, you are fulfilling his needs. Your submission is a great sacrifice, very much appreciated by someone like Robert. This could be your purpose narrator, not necessarily your doom.’

‘I see.’

‘So, let me ask this from you. Do you feel content within your possession status?’

‘I understand that it could be worse. But I-’

Roberta clapped her notebook together.

‘Well, then it doesn’t seem like we have any issues here. I would suggest taking some Calcium for the bone damage, but it seems to me that you have a rather healthy relationship with Robert. My assistant can book the next appointment for you, if there is any need for that.’

We left Roberta’s office and even though I tried not to, I ended up feeling a bit disappointed. Perhaps I am just someone who is meant to be possessed.