OCD
Imperfect solitude
waking up to Smokey's anus.
I make earl gray
because coffee makes me nervous.
The morning is fog.
I don't know what I want
but your fears make me nervous.
There's pain outside.
It's too cold for one of our picnics.
A pearlescent sadness
hangs over this city.
You hug me from behind.
Surprise attacks make me nervous.
I remember to remember us.
Stress lowers life span.
I want another hug face to face
to stop being nervous.
Hell's Gate
The bombs you watered
have turned into roses.
What's the other side of doom?
Forgiveness? Realization?
My favorite band is Nine Inch Nails
because pain is presented
without answers.
At the mental hospital,
the second skill they taught me
was how to listen.
I sat there and received an invisible orb.
I crave mercy from Jesus
because demon brain says fuck no,
crave being dead.
My dad took the gun out of my house,
one small black question mark.
Today, I saw a mockingbird
trapped in barbed wire
above some auto dealership.
It was wriggling free.
Its wings were red hands.
