I desperately wanted to have a breakdown in someone's arms.

The cop and strip club security guard had climbed onto the roof from outside the building and were trying to get in through the locked laundry room window. Claire let them in.

It took three of us to get a king size mattress stuffed into the tiny service elevator, pushing our shoulders into it so it would finally give and bend. It sprung out when the doors opened, like a

Of course, I thought about these uncles. Even WhatsApp-d some of them when I remembered.

Long before I wore wigs to punish the men who had punished me, I wore them to channel Selma Blair. I was thirteen, my flat chest leaned over the bathroom sink. We were both brunettes, but that’s

He spiked a 104 fever and just as I called his neurologist to ask if we should head to the ER, my son seized for the first time in over 157 million seconds.

The second time I gave him head he couldn’t get hard. He said this never happens.

Someone behind him checked their phone and I saw the time. 1:36am. I thought about what would happen when the bar flicks the lights on and everyone scatter like roaches

Ball sweat, BO, ass, dirty armpits, nail polish, hairspray, feet, Newports, Bugler, Jack Daniels, vodka, cupcakes, tequila, donuts, Squirt, hot Cheetos, McDonald’s wrappers, coffee left sitting out for weeks...

“Because of nothing we are together.”
—KA

Now, there were two biographers and a documentary filmmaker circling her fame like the moons of Planet Kathy, goddess of love and lust rising in

“I’ve asked you here tonight to tell you I’ve told my wife everything. She’s fine with it, she really is, and I want to really emphasize that. She only asks that we’re not intimate in our bed. Hers

“Streetwise, streetwise.”

February 21 – Hungover. And sometimes that’s good.

“How do you say, I am the wolf.”

“Je suis le loup. Tu es mon loup. You are my wolf.”

“Je suis le loup,” I say.

The night I met Ray Liotta I was backstage at a Kid Rock concert

Augmentation, arrangements, verities, varial flips . . .

The Jessicas, a clique of girls all named, you guessed it, Jessica, were especially mean.

Linsday Lohan smoking freely on the leather couch in the corner when she was supposed to be on house arrest at Chateau Marmont, and she came nightly, in fact, and always hugged us all at the end of the night, when she would leave to fuck our manager,

Not all her parties were sex parties and she didn’t always call me her girlfriend, but we rode that late summer into an Autumn of mostly lesbian orgies. Sabine driving the car, everyone else an

Few are lucky enough to realize when their destiny is laid before them. I am one of the lucky few. Mine came when my parents suggested a cruise to the Mexican Riviera from Christmas to New Year’s Eve.

On the drive from our apartment to the emergency room, you take Fullerton through DePaul’s campus. The silence between us makes sense, but without even your usual pop punk to pad it, it feels

Lately, it seems like all the women I know are leaving their husbands for other women. I moved from the big city back to the small Southern town where I went to college, and they began to flock to me,

The final weekend of January I boarded a plane to Seattle to see, for the first time, a man I had met on a kink website. Or, as I had considered multiple times over the last two months during which we

But she is always here, always too strong to evaporate into some kind of hereto after.

I should have called out, “Marry me,” followed by your name, in that quarter-second of dead air.
Nothing too prosaic, nothing too provocative, just four beats, a stunted swirl of “M”s and “R”s.
My