On your knees, piggy Macy replied.

The West was declining, masculinity was dissolving into cotton-candy sky. There are few of our kind remaining… his brothers wrote in the Instagram comments of a masculinity influencer. Come with us now, the influencer had written. There are new worlds to save.

Maybe I was smoking all wrong, but it appeared that I needed another smoke.

It’s been two weeks since our last contact.

Bud is either dead, on a bender, or has forgotten about me.

I pick up my iPhone.

 hey. I type.

The message bubble turns green.

Bud, what’s

Bird heart

I was hiking the canyons alone when a mountain lion appeared on the path in front of me. Needless to say I was surprised. I had never seen a mountain lion in the wild before, so you

Money’s what lets me know I’m a good whore.

Novel excerpt:

Alex hands her a plastic cup filled to the brim with tequila and places his body carefully next to hers. The moment of transgression is fast approaching.

“Do you skate?” Chloe

When you join the creative department of SpyRE as an intern, you are told two things by HR.

Because Prince said sometimes it snows in April, one day it did. The snow pummeled us, then melted, then pooled on the sidewalks and in the streets, only to freeze under a full moon. The ice sealed so

The spider, god, the devil, me, Kevin Bacon, the dog… The dog, realizing she’d been referred to, thumped her tail twice somewhere in the other room …What’s the difference? What’s the distance?

I’m not a fan of Roseanne, but I hope she never has to watch this.

Lloyd finishes reading and Rae turns to me and says, Who was that guy, did you know him? And I say, Dude, that was Lloyd. And she says, What the fuck, that was Lloyd? And I say, That was Lloyd.

I.

Lately: she looks in the mirror and pulls at her eyelashes. Gently, at first, but then harder until finally each eyelash comes off one by one with a thin line of skin attached, like when you

She was a kid, he reasoned. She’d grow out of her ridiculous ideology. It wasn’t worth a confrontation.

It is impossible to determine merely by looking how recently a modern American woman has been vaginally penetrated or rectally sodomized. One can never trust scientific data on matters such as how often a modern American woman is made love to in [enter current year].

Her eyes looked up and zeroed in on Marina’s Muses. On the women floating through the air. No cares. Just an angel dancing in the blue heavens. 

That cicatrice ringing the heart, like notches on the prison wall, that sharp sweet spoor.

I eat a big salad and watch Kim and Kourtney eat big salads on a ten-year-old episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

We scuttled in through the back door, out of the glaring summer heat, bare feet welcoming the cool linoleum of the kitchen floor. Chattering like a pair of squirrels we rifled the pantry, pulling the

A year after my wife Ada disappeared, I started attending the book club.

During the first rehearsal, her troupe members burn her thighs with incense sticks. It’s not hazing, it’s just how they bond.

Arnold Palmer died today. The news anchor announces it on the TV hanging in the corner as I’m dealt a pair of 9’s at a Jacks or Better machine. Suddenly it doesn’t matter that the news anchor

The man at Hertz handed me the keys to a blue Corolla and smiled, revealing a large, distracting gap. In a boyish drawl he told me to return the car with a full tank, otherwise incur a $10 fee. I

C lives in a building that’s beautiful and tall, and that’s sort of how he is, too, but I hope

to God no one ever tells him that.

Today you are thinking about that time when you were thirteen years old.

Whenever it comes back, it’s important to remember that nothing truly bad ever happens to you. Indeed, this simple strategy