at work last night a group of brisbane boys came to sydney
they hired our function room to celebrate their friend's bucks night
they had been at the races all day betting on horses and getting drunk
they hired a topless waitress whose job it was to walk around and ask the boys what they wanted and then to giggle no matter what
i stood behind the bar and watched things happen
i watched the topless waitress remove a hand from her bottom
i watched the topless waitress get told her name was "tits"
i watched the topless waitress say, 'do you want a beer' and the guy say, 'love, I'd smash a hundred' and the topless waitress say, 'a hundred, hehehehe, how long would it, like, take you to drink a hundred beers?' and the guy say, 'bout an hour,' and the topless waitress say, 'hehehehe, reckon you could?' and the guy say, 'fucking oath'
i watched the topless waitress walk towards me
she told me she'd been topless waitressing for 20 years
she said, 'but now that i have a kid and i'm 40 i don't want to do it anymore'
i asked her what else she was gonna do and she laughed
the groom and the groom's father and the bride's father walked toward us
the groom and the groom's father were very drunk but the bride's father seemed fucked
someone looked at the bride's father and said, 'that old guy's cunted, hey'
the topless waitress said, 'he's okay. he just had a stroke'
the groom and the groom's father and the bride's father reached the bar
they started asking the topless waitress if her tits were real
they asked if they could touch them
the groom's father said, 'we're bloody paying for them so we better be able to touch them'
i poured beers for the groom
i poured beers for the groom's father
i poured beers for the bride's father
a stripper arrived
she told the boys they had been bad boys
she told them she was there to punish them
she put a small dildo inside her and then a larger dildo inside her
the boys cheered
the grooms father yelled, 'destroy it'
i thought: destroy it
referring to myself
i don't know
the topless waitress knelt down behind the bar
she began rolling a cigarette
then she looked up
she was smiling
and i was smiling too
these were smiles i'd seen before
on the faces of cattle strung by their feet to the ceilings of slaughter houses
the smile you make when everything's about to tear apart